Undetected location. NO YES. Selected type: Paperback. Added to Your Shopping Cart. This is a dummy description. Get customers, clients, and co-workers to say "yes! Learn dozens of all-new techniques and strategies for influencing others including how to reduce resistance to rubble Make people feel instantly comfortable in your presence Decode body language, build credibility, and be persistent without being a pain Expert author Kevin Hogan turns the enigmatic art of influence and persuasion into a science anyone can master The amazing secret of The Science of Influence is its simplicity.
About the Author Kevin Hogan is a public speaker and corporate trainer. He teaches, trains, and speaks about persuasion, influence, body language, emotional intelligence, communication, and motivation. Hogan holds a doctorate degree in psychology and has studied extensively in the fields of influence, hypnosis, and nonverbal communication.
But beyond that, try and make it a habit. Make it a point to listen to people's ideas and thoughts and to consider what they have to say. In doing so, you'll become a better communicator, because you'll be able to make connections and specific points to persuade the person you're talking to from things that they have said. What's more, you may get some very good new ideas out of the bargain. This point is especially important for people who want to influence others in group settings, such as at meetings and forums.
To a large extent, how much you say in these settings is related to how much influence you have. You might even call it the "squeaky wheel syndrome. Research has shown that in groups and especially in business meetings , women tend to talk much less than men, and so women should be particularly aware of this.
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But the point is important for both sexes--while listening is very important, don't let it be all that you do. Again, be careful that you do strike that balance between listening and talking. If all you can hear is the sound of your own voice, you've taken this point too far. That is, they generally won't go out of their way to listen to an opposing opinion. For example, if you give a talk at the public library on how to keep big businesses from coming in and destroying local businesses, who do you think will be in the audience?
That's right --local business owners, or people who want to preserve the unique flavor of the town. Other people, such as those who are excited about the possibility of a big department store, or people who simply don't much care, aren't likely to show up. The lesson here? The people who you really want to reach, whose opinions and ideas are very different from your own--probably won't be knocking on your door. Rather, you will need to seek out them if you want your voice to be heard.
Things take time if they are going to be done well, whether we like it or not. Author Stephen Covey writes, "I see people trying to do it all over a weekend--trying to rebuild their marriage on a weekend, trying to rebuild an alienated relationship with their son on a weekend, trying to change a company culture on a weekend. But some things just can't be done on a weekend. Opinions may take a long time to change. That makes sense--people may have had a lifetime to form them; they usually won't change after a single conversation. Influencing people to change their actions can take even longer.
Even if someone knows they should do something, it's not always that easy. Ask any smoker who is trying to quit--change takes time. Leaders need to remember this, especially leaders in the fields of community health and development work. It takes time. Some things it may take a lifetime--or longer--to change.
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Think of creating world peace, ending hunger, or having a clean environment. None of these will happen overnight. The important thing for community leaders to remember is to keep working at it, and to take pleasure in the small successes we win along the way. In the last few paragraphs, we've looked at some everyday things you can do to be ready to influence people when the need arises. Now, let's jump briefly to some simple tactics that can be used when that moment does come up. Although it's always helpful to have "primed the pump" as we discussed above, the following tactics are very simple.
Many of these can be used even if you've never seen the person you want to influence before--they are simple "street corner" tactics that can stand on their own. If everyone else were doing something, would you do it, too? Well, according to the laws of persuasion, you very well might. People like to do what everybody else is doing.
If everyone else is signing your petition, passersby will be drawn to it as well. If half the people in town are sporting bumper stickers for your organization, the other half will probably want to know where they can pick up one as well. And so on. As a small child, you learn that when someone gives you something, you should give something back.
If someone smiles at you, you smile back. If someone gives you a Christmas present and you don't have anything for them, you feel bad. This idea of reciprocity can be very powerful for people trying to persuade others to do something, especially if you want them to donate to your work. By giving people something small, they may feel required to respond, and then think, "Oh, it's something good to support, anyway," and make a nice-sized contribution.
For example, a group trying to raise money for breast cancer research developed a list of potential donors. Then, they sent each of those people personalized return address labels with a pink ribbon. In a cover letter, they thanked donors for past support, asked them to use the labels to support awareness, and by the way! As you might imagine, this campaign was quite successful.
Then, make whatever you want to convince people of agree with what they have been saying. Generally, when people take a stand, they want to be consistent.
So, if you can get someone to agree on several points related to what you want them to do or believe, it's harder for them to turn you down when you come in for the punch. Make sense? Steve Booth-Butterfield, an expert on persuasion, explains this idea with the following example:.source url
'Would you be willing?': words to turn a conversation around (and those to avoid)
Earnest Salesperson : "Excuse me, but do you think that a good education is important for your kids? May I come in and help improve your child's health education? The tactics above give you some simple ways to influence people, especially for small or short term ends. But when the stakes are higher, or you are looking for long-term changes, how do you bring that about?
One possibility is an approach similar to the one given on the next few pages.
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As you consider the following points, however, remember that every person and every situation are different. Take these points as suggestions, and modify them to fit your situation. This includes deciding what is essential--what you absolutely, positively want to see happen. It also includes what you might be willing to give up. Consider possible compromises that might be acceptable. Your situation might not have any of this middle ground.
For example, you might want people to believe your organization is very important--period, end of discussion. That's probably not something you are willing to compromise on. But in situations where you want people to do something, and not just believe something, the art of compromise can be very important. However, you would be happy to get a smaller donation as well, or a gift in-kind instead of cash.
This may be obvious--for example, you may want to convince a member of your staff to work harder, and can best do so by speaking with her personally. However, sometimes the people whose behavior or attitudes you want to see changed may not be the ones you are best suited to talk to.